Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in Joe Hedberg's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, May 16th, 2001
1:37 pm	Winter becomes Spring So wrapping up senior experience makes me think about college. Next year I'll be off on my own, in a dorm room which would more appropriately be called closet. I guess I'll have to adorn my jerkenstocks all the time along with an ivy league hat, shorts, and school-brand key noose. Hey, does anybody know if Phish albums are issued to college kids or do I need to pick up my own? Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Busy buzz of Seniors working--and by working i mean slacking (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, April 23rd, 2001
1:37 pm	Sunny Day (r.e.) Sunday: What an excellent day. Spring Break: What an excellent break. Ahhhh. What a relaxing break. I realized that all my life i've been living in new jersey. This week I finally got to experience not jersey. It was so refreshing to take a breath of unpolluted air and look at a skyline not obscured by skyscrapers. If nothing else, it is nice change. Well back to school. School: What a rude awakening from the slumber of spring break. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Percolating coffee (Comment on this)
Monday, April 9th, 2001
1:37 pm	You Gander I ran into a gander of geese today. Haha, they're so funny. I chased them and they ran away, flapping their wings several times, but never leaving the ground. Strange that when you chase them, they only return to where you were or circle back there. Boy were they confused. If they only knew what I was saying..... Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Nooner (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, April 5th, 2001
1:37 pm	Flippin Nice Today was the nicest day ever. I chilled in the park and eight some lunch. I watched a very old sci-fi movie about gigantic ants with my g/f. After that I definitely went up to Garret Mountain and did some outdoor bouldering. It's a lot different from the gym, but definitely more pieceful and secluded. I hope SPRING BRAKE is really nice whether because I want to spend the entire time outdoors, walking, hiking, climbing and, of coarse, jumping out of an airplain. Go School! Go Spring Brake! Go Senioritis! Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Young Turks (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 3rd, 2001
1:37 pm	Mad Lib Yo! I hate [AP Class] so much. I've got a ton of problems to do and I don't even know what [topic] means. I [expletive] can't deal with this any more. I really wish I didn't take this class and had [# of mods for the class] more free mods. I can't really agree with [livejournal user]'s journal about [Another AP Class]. He/She is getting a [bad grade] and complains while i get a [worse grade]. Ughhh! And I still have to write my [expletive] [assignment for senior seminar]. Jeeeez. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: You ever see a hearse go by.... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, March 31st, 2001
1:37 pm	Lost Left Hand this week, I walked around without my left hand. Sure is shocking how true it is to not know what you've got until it's gone. Helplessly, I've been searching and its location has been narrowed down to a half dozen placed. Rescuing it is my main goal and I hope to track it down in one of these unsearched places. Never again will it be left to wander by itself; it will stay firmly attached from now on. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Rhythm of the rain beating on the windows (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 25th, 2001
1:37 pm	Hot Damn, what a fine window treatment! This weekend sucked. I was sick and all I did was nap and take medicine. Damn, writing this journal really drained me. I'm gonna go rest. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Sniffles (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 22nd, 2001
1:37 pm	There's someone for everyone. (SLUT!) Now as I move through my basement (no longer described as walking, but rather as spelunking), I can't help but think of one of the most common english errors. When your friend is blue about the relationship game, the cliche answer is to tell him that he or she will find somebody. There is someone for everyone. Perhaps the gloomy party may be cheered up if he actually know what his oracle-licious friend was saying. The first half of the phrase (there is someone) implies the existence of at least one person. The second part of the phrase says that this person is for everyone. So if we take the word 'for' to mean 'sleeps with', then we have a single individual who sleeps with everyone. Awfully raunchy if I may say so. So, your consolation lexicon should be purged of this erroneous entry and in its place should be: For everyone, there is someone. AEIO! Current Mood: relieved Current Music: Farts (1 Comment |Comment on this)
1:37 pm	Head for Higher Ground I need to head for higher ground. Perhaps that sexy mexican maid will clean up mother's milk. I think I may know the alleged burial site of Noah's ark as evinced be a recent inundation. I think history has repeated itself and a flood of biblical proportions is manifesting itself in my basement. Build the ark, head for higher ground. Damn, how many cubits long was it now..... Current Mood: Up a basement without a paddle Current Music: Sump Pump (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 20th, 2001
1:37 pm	This is not a live journal entry So I was sitting in the waiting room today. I like to think of myself as a patient boy. Actually, tonight I slew a few dragons. I laid to rest two which had been giving me quite some trouble. Two steps forward and one back, I met another set of twin dragons. I wish I could say that I laid them down; however, I smote them several times. Exhausted, I told my wounded opponents that I would return later in the week to finish the job. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Social Distortion (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, March 19th, 2001
1:37 pm	There's a fire in the pants I'm not wearing 8) Just remembering Vassar, when they pulled the fire alarm and I was in the shower and had to come out in only a towel. Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Velocity Girl (Comment on this)
1:37 pm	Genesis Bahhhh. In the beginning, god said, "Let there be live journals," and there was. On the first day, god attended to her most important duties and went about her house, dusting and vacuuming. Remember that cleanliness is next to godliness. On the second day, god became quite lonely in her empty, but spotless domicile. She created adam, the first man. From adam, she borrowed one rib and from this rib created steve. Having an extra rib, steve now assumed the dominant position, effectively making adam his bitch. On the third day, god forget to make the dinosaurs and destroyed adam and steve. On the forth day, she created the dinosaurs. On the fifth day she had quite the case of PMS and wiped those mother f**kers right off the face of the planet. She also had enough time on the fifth day to create midol, perhaps one of her greatest achievements. On the sixth day, she reincarnated adam and steve and their relationship, as it was before their demise, was once again forged. Adam and steve begat two daughters, maud and gertrude. On the seventh day, content with the clockwork she had set into motion, god, just like every high-school senior, slacked. Current Mood: flummoxed Current Music: Humming Computer, buzzing faulty fluorescent light (3 Comments |Comment on this)