Perhaps the gloomy party may be cheered up if he actually know what his oracle-licious friend was saying. The first half of the phrase (there is someone) implies the existence of at least one person. The second part of the phrase says that this person is for everyone. So if we take the word 'for' to mean 'sleeps with', then we have a single individual who sleeps with everyone. Awfully raunchy if I may say so.
So, your consolation lexicon should be purged of this erroneous entry and in its place should be:
For everyone, there is someone.